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end-of-life-wishes-conversation

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Have the conversation about someone's end-of-life wishes — before a crisis forces it — gently, respectfully, and thoroughly enough to actually guide decisions later. Use when asked how do I talk about end-of-life wishes, discuss my parent's wishes, advance care planning conversation, or ask about their medical and final wishes. Produces a way to open this hard conversation without it feeling morbid or forced, the areas to cover (medical wishes, care preferences, where they want to be, what matters to them, practical/legal), how to listen rather than impose, and how to document and share what's decided — so their wishes are known and honored. Not legal or medical advice.

skills/end-of-life-wishes-conversation/SKILL.md

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# End-of-Life Wishes Conversation

The conversation nobody wants to have is the one that, unhad, leaves families guessing and guilt-ridden during a crisis — making wrenching decisions with no idea what their loved one would have wanted. Having it *before* a crisis, gently and thoroughly, is one of the greatest gifts a family can give each other. This helps you open it without it feeling morbid, cover what matters, listen well, and capture the wishes so they can actually be honored. Not legal or medical advice.

## What This Skill Produces

- **A gentle opening** — a way to start this conversation that doesn't feel morbid, forced, or like you're rushing them toward death (a news story, a form to fill, "I want to make sure we honor what you want")
- **The areas to cover** — medical wishes (interventions, resuscitation, comfort vs. aggressive care), where they want to be cared for and to die, what quality of life means to them, spiritual/personal wishes, and the practical/legal pieces (documents, who decides)
- **A listen-don't-impose stance** — how to draw out *their* wishes rather than project your own or steer them
- **How to handle resistance** — if they don't want to talk about it, how to ease in without forcing
- **Capturing & sharing it** — how to document the wishes and make sure the right people (family, doctors) know them, and a nudge toward proper advance-directive documents
- **A boundary** — this guides the conversation; the legal documents and medical specifics need professionals

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